i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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