i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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