worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
