K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
MIDGETS
????
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Randomize
