Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize