thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
