i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize
