So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
one might say we're banned from that church
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
