Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
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