Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
