I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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