If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
