how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
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