I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
