They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
