Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
