I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
