The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
