I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
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