420 ftw
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
