we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Randomize