Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
