Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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