The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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