i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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