ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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