Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
