its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize
