She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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