This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'd cum for enchiladas.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
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