I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
