I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
