she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Randomize
