jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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