One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
