i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
