i don't like sucking hair
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
