im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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