Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
