do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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