If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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