We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
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