Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize