you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
