am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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