There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
