This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
