you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Mom said you looked used
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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