We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
