Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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