my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize